Word of my ability to poop-at-will, and to make Peoples' eyes water because of it, have reached Important People. They were so impressed by the awesomeness of my pooply stench that they emailed me and asked "hey, would you like to try some of this?"
I'm all about the free stuff, baby. Of course I said yes.
And you know what? The stuff works. Either Buddah or I can lay this massive stink bomb, and the Woman spritzes a little bit, and vwala, people stop gagging. Better yet, the Woman gets all coughy around most stuff that has a smell, like perfume and candles and armpits, but this stuff didn't bother her. I worried just a tiny bit that when I said yes the Woman would be all "Oh No you didn't!" because she has "breathing issues" but she doesn't mind it and likes the smell it leaves in the air.
I can't figure out how to work the bottle myself, but I suspect it would do a fine job of covering up People Funk, too. I wonder if there's a way to get them to use it like deodorant...?