January 30, 2012

Ok, now the Man is going too far. He's attacking me with THINGS now and not just his hand...

I help my ground though. And next time, I bite harder...

January 29, 2012

Doods, tonight there was steak! Real live fresh dead cow! I kinda hoped for it because the Younger Human came over and when he comes over there's usually something good, but I started to worry when he and the People got up and left the house. I know I can't count on the Man or the Woman for tasty treats, and what if he didn't come back with them?

But an hour or so later they came back, and there was steak! The Woman cut it up and out it on my plate, but I saw the box it was in, and the Younger Human was the one who brought the box in, so I know wo it was really from. He also had a giant steak bone in that box--I could totally smell it--but that was for That Damned Dog Butters, which is fine. A dog needs a good bone to gnaw on once in a while and I'm not terribly fond of things I can't easily chew and swallow.

Or just swallow. Sometimes I don't bother chewing.

But doods, as wonderful as getting the steak was, today is a sad day. Today a really good man, Jeter's best human friend in the whole world, Sarge Charlie, lost his fight with cancer. Sarge was a tough guy and fought really hard, but the thing is he was as upstanding as he was tough, so losing him is like punching a giant hole in the world's spotlight. We're all a little dimmer for it.

I lurked on Sarge's blog and I wish I had commented more, but it was fun to just read him. I am very grateful that Jeter pointed us all to him, just to have known that he existed.

I know Jeter is really hurting, and so is his mom, because they truly loved Sarge. And Empress Bee, his wife and soulmate, is hurting the most. She's really sweet and I lurk on her blog, and so should you, too.

Sarge, I salute you. I wish I had known you better, but mostly I'm am just happy I got to even know about you.

January 25, 2012

All that noisy stuff the Woman needed to do in the front room...I should have known it was going to inconvenience me. Doods, everything got taken out of that room and jammed into the library, which made getting to the comfy loveseat to look out the window impossible, and the floor got covered with plastic which was horrible to walk on.

If that weren't bad enough, she started smearing this stuff on the walls and turned everything from a pleasant brown to this bright, eye-stabbing yellow, and she's so freaking proud of herself she keeps saying, "It's so much brighter in here!" Like that's a GOOD thing. I was quite happy with the brown walls and the dim light and having the dammit machines right there where they mocked the people every time they went past.

Evidently the mocking got to be too much. One of the dammit machines got dragged out the front door and I'm not so sure the Man didn't shoot it and kill it out there, because it never came back. The other dammit machines are now in the library, and the now-yellow room has, like, REAL furniture in it.

But the bonus, what makes it all not quite so horrible, is that they put one of the climbing towers in the library, and next to it is a bookcase that we can jump on and doods, we can see EVERYTHING out the window now! Not just the stupid bushes. AND we can jump from there onto the other bookcases. It's almost like they did it on purpose so that we could have some fun, but I'm pretty sure their brains don't work like that.

They haven't moved everything back into place so there are no pictures, but as soon as I can I'll totally show you how awesome it is.

In the meantime, doods, we have something serious we need to worry about. Look.

The birds are arming themselves and fighting back. This could be really bad news for our outside friends. We need to figure out what to do, because of we don't stop them, the birds will win and WE CANNOT LET THE BIRDS WIN!!!

January 20, 2012

Man...the Woman told me I need to stay in the back of the house and snooze on the climbing tower in the office, or on the big bed with Buddah, but she would appreciate it if I didn't come out to the living room. I was all Hey, I live here, I'll do what I want! but then she showed me this picture.

I dunno who he is, but she says he's been there by the front door for a long time, trying to stay out of the rain, and if I go out there I'll look out the long window by the door, and I'll get all excited and start banging on the glass, and that will scare him. If I scare him, he'll run, and it's raining pretty hard.

Ok, fine, I think he's probably tougher than that, but I didn't want to go out there anyway.

What's funny is that she needs to do noisy stuff in the front room, but since it is raining, she's going to do it later. That's her excuse, anyway. I think she's just lazy.

January 16, 2012

Kill it kill it kill it killitkillitkillitkillit!

I hope he gets it...

January 15, 2012

Buddah likes high places; I like them, too, but I'm fine if I'm up on top of the office closets, or stretched out on the floor. I like my mancat cave in the big closet, I like my cubby by the fireplace thingy, I like sleeping on the sofa, and I like being on the big bed that I allow the Woman to use at night.

Buddah is okay with sleeping on the big bed and stuff, but he loves being up high. And there are lots of high spots for him around here, like on top of the kitchen cupboards--the people don't keep anything up there just so he can be up there--and he likes to sit on the fake fireplace thingy in the other room.

He's on that thing a lot, and sometimes when a people walks by him they try to pet him, but he sometimes takes a swipe at them with claws out. If he's on the short tree by the front window and a people tries to pet him, same thing. Sometimes he lets them, but a lot of the time he doesn't.

A few weeks ago he was on the counter and the Woman picked him up to give him some cuddles and doods, he went apeshit crazy on her, bit her arm so hard that it drew blood (and she still has the marks) and he wailed at her. Even after she put him down, he was all flat eared and hissy.

He gets that way sometimes. He's also afraid of feet with new shoes on them, and has been known to just outright go after legs that are passing him in the hall. If he didn't use claws and teeth, the people wouldn't mind, but that whole bleeding thing gets to them.

For Christmas Santa brought us this new tree. It's taller than the one in the front room, but not as tall as the one in the office. It was supposed to replace the one in the front room, but Buddah seemed to like the spot where Santa put it, so it's stayed there. He hangs out on it a lot, so much that I've kind of given up the idea that it's ours; it's his. I only get on it to annoy him.

But the Woman noticed something. When Buddah is on top of it, he's pretty much at her eye level...and she can pet him without him getting all freaked out. If he's on the counter and she tries to touch him and he's not down for that, he can turn around and jump on it. She can even reach across the counter to give him some crunchy treats.

He's even been getting in her lap more. He's had this whole Commado Cuddle thing going on since he was a kitten, where he would run up, get held and petted for like 30 seconds, then he'd run off, but he's been plopping down on her (which makes using the laptop fun cause it seems like he always does it when she's using it) and getting skritches for a long time. Sometimes he even snoozes.

She figured out from watching My Cat From Hell last year that Buddah is a tree kitty. You know, some kitties are "bush" kitties, some are tree kitties. He's definitely a tree kitty. When she watched it last week she finally got it into her head that he feels safe when he's up high, and when he's at eye level and she tries to pet, he doesn't feel threatened.

He was a shelter kitty; during that whole time when he was supposed to learn how not to scratch and bite hard he probably wasn't with his mom-cat, and he was probably scrambling to get to the food bowl to get enough to eat (for a long, long time he looked over his shoulder when he was eating, like he was afraid I was going to take his food away...and I would have, so he eats on the counter while I eat on the floor...) and he might have missed some of the key socialization lessons.

So the tree Santa brought is definitely going to stay where it is, and pretty soon there will be more painting going on here, and when that's done stuff will be moved around, and part of the end result will be more high places for Buddah, and hopefully with better flow so he can get all the way around the front room while being up high.

No one expects him to stop being so bitey once in a while--heck, I bite, but I know how to not sink my teeth in, I do a I-could-if-I-wanted bite--but if more high places will make him happy, then they'll give him a few more high places.

I'm all for it if it means he'll leave me alone more. Plus, I wouldn't mind a few more high spots. Hopefully he'll share...

January 13, 2012

What am I looking at? I'm looking at a plate. A plate that had pizza on it. Cheese pizza. Warm, happy cheese pizza.

What am I looking at now? I'm looking at the Woman. She has the plate that has the pizza. I am using my brainwaves to tell her GIVE ME THE PIZZA.

And ya know what? It worked! She left some cheese and a little bit of crust on the plate and put it on the floor and told me to go for it.

So I did.

And it was good.

January 10, 2012


A lot of our people walk for boobies...but Boobie Season hasn't started yet, and some of them aren't even training for it yet. Because they're lazy and chit like that.

But Mom Amanda from PB&J is RUNNING for Leukemia & Lymphoma in like 18 or 19 days, and needs ours support. This thing means a lot to the Woman because her mom had lymphoma and beat that sucker down, but it takes money to fight it.

One of the things about events like this is that there's a minimum, dollar amount the people doing it have to raise...if they're like a dollar short, they've done all that training and don't get to play. There are lots of reasons for it, but it kinda sucks.

Now, I know how much the Woman whines about walking, so I can imagine how much whining there is about running. And doods, I am all for the self-torture of people, so we have to make this happen. $700 more bucks and she has to run! That's it, Just $700 to torture her for an entire half marathon!

Better yet, if she gets $3720 more, she'll run in a full Tinkerbell costume.


This MUST happen!

First, though, let's get her to her minimum. Because there's nothing that says Happy New Year like making a person sweat, cry and RUN...

January 07, 2012

It wasn't really cold today, but after dinner we kind of wanted some extra warms, so I started asking the Woman to turn the fireplace thingy on.

She kept telling me I'd already eaten. Duh. I knew that. If she would just listen, she'd know what I want. I kept asking, but after a few minutes I knew she was ignoring me, and I was pretty sure we weren't getting the fire tonight.

But then Buddah jumped into her lap--even though she had the laptop there, and shoved his head under her hand and then she was all "Oh you poor thing, your ears are cold!"

So she turned the fire on.

Ok, I don't know why this picture is upside down, but I can't get it to flip, so just stand on your head to view.

I actually got to plop down in front if it first, and when I was done Buddah stretched out to soak up some warms. Now we're both done but she hasn't gotten up to turn it off yet, which just makes me think that deep down she was cold, too, and just made us beg for the hell of it.

You see that white plastic thingy on the floor?

That's where the red dot lives. Sometimes it comes out and tuns around the room, but for the most part I ignore it. I mean, I've seen it a billion times and it's never eaten anyone or even bit anyone, so I figure it's fine to just let it play a bit. But Buddah wants to get it...and he figured out that it might be better to let it run around, but try to kill the thing it lives in.

There's this little round hole that the red dot jumps out of, so Buddah has been going after that. It's been tough, because the hole tries to keep an eye on the red dot so it spins around and around, but Buddah doesn't give up. One of these days he's going to kill the thing the red dot lives in, and I suppose after that he can go after the red dot, too. He might as well, since it won't have a place to live.

January 04, 2012

That thing I killed in the pictures I put up yesterday? It's a snake thingy that Santa brought, but I have it on good authority that he got it from Purrfect Play. So if you want to suck up to your people, maybe you can talk them into getting you one, because doods, it is AWESOME.

They also have funny looking mousies and other fun toys stuffed with killer catnip.

I'm gonna save some money and get me another one when this one is good and dead.

January 03, 2012

This is NOT me playing.

Neither is this.

No, I was not playing. I was killing. And I killed the bejeezus out of that thing! But not enough to make it useless or anything, because I'm pretty sure I want to kill it again later.

January 02, 2012

Bear with me, doods...we're playing with the template and it might change a bazillion times tonight...