April 01, 2008

Ohh...guys....Oh man. I discovered something this morning. Mirrors are TEH EVIL!!11!! I was helping the Woman wake up this morning and she stumbled into the bathroom so she could stuff herself full of drugs meds, and I jumped up onto the back of the porcelain litter box...and I saw myself in the mirror.

Whoa. I am fat. Why didn't anyone tell me? I have these rolls coming off my stomach when I sit down, and it looks like my fur is puddling around my legs. It's gross.

I think I'm gonna have to give up the crunchy treats. And the shrimp. But what am I gonna do without shrimp? Real live fresh dead shrimp. I drool just thinking about it.

But I'm fat. I gotta give it up.


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