This morning, I was really nice to the Woman. I climbed on top of her at 8 o'clock and waited very patiently until it was time for her to wake up. She sleeps later than most people do, because deep down she is lazy, and I can say that because it's not like it's some huge secret. I waited and purred and occasionally petted her face, and when it was time for her to wake up I climbed onto her pillow, put my face right by her ear and said, very gently, WAKE UP I AM HUNGRY!!!
Well, now. You'd think I stabbed her in the eat with a Q-tip or something.
In spite of my niceness she didn't jump up and open my can of Stinky Goodness. No, she feels like she can take the time to visit the giant litter box room, where she takes care of biznezz and drugs up. And just to annoy me now she stands on this thing that says "GET OFF ME YOU'RE FAT."
I think the goal is to stand on it every day until it says, "Well, ok. That's not too bad." But until then she's KILLING it and I don't think it's happy, not at all.
See, she's tormenting EVERYONE in the morning when we'd all be happy if she would just get up and feed me!