Happy Easter my ass. You know how I celebrated? Do you?
It started out with the Woman, in all her glorious stupidity, locking me in the closet again! She opened it to get some clothes out, and you’d think by now she’d know that I like to go in and curl up on the blanket in there. But nooooo…she closed the freaking door and it took two hours before she realized I was in there.
To make matters worse, the People disappeared for most of the day, and she was late in getting my dinner. Oh, she said she was sorry, but I don’t believe it. No way. She ran in the front door, saying how sorry she was, and she fed me, but then she turned around and left again for at least another hour.
After they came home to stay, she was in the kitchen puttering around, and I went in there to munch on the mostly-acceptable dry food, and what happens? She stepped on me! This wasn’t a little pinch to my tail—she stomped on my entire foot with her entire foot. Like, about a ton of Stomping Human Femaleness. Yeah, well, I hollered a good one—because that makes her feel bad—and ran upstairs. The Man followed me up and picked me up. As if I wasn’t pissed off enough, he picked me up and took me back into the freaking kitchen.
All right, he took me back so that the Woman could give me a treat or two or fifteen, but still.
These People never learn. Never.