June 28, 2014

You take an all day nap and see what happens...

Ok, so the day before yesterday I took a long nap in the closet, because that's one of my favorite places to hang out, especially with the noisy people here, and when I got up they were gone and we had a floor in the kitchen.

I had to inspect it, of course
The Woman says it's not done because it needs grout, but this is still an improvement over the bare cement that was left when they took away the old floor. She also says I'm not allowed to dribble my food on it. Phfft. Though I suppose that's more polite than what one of the noisy guys said...he told her not to let me pee on it.

Dood. I have a litter box. I have no need to pee in the kitchen.

Yesterday I took another nap, then got pulled out of the closet because the Man needed to take a pre-work nap and apparently he can't do that with me in the closet. Don't ask me why, I don't know. It's not like he wanted to sleep in the closet.

So I hung out with the Woman in the other room for a few hours, and when the noisy guy left, we had these:


Cabinets! They're not all done, though. Most of them are up, but there are still a few to go, and the People think that the noisy guy who installed them is going to have to move one because there's not enough room for the stove. And then there might be issues with the fridge. But they're pretty sure it will all be sorted out in the end. At least no one is worried yet.


Buddah and I had to explore a lot, which made the Woman go get a bunch of towels to cover things up because she doesn't want any scratches before the kitchen is even done, and there's a gap between one of them and the wall where Buddah could get caught, so they blocked that off, too.

I don't really like having to stay in the back of the house all day, even if it's what I usually do, but coming out every evening is pretty exciting because things are changing almost every day (not today...noisy guy wanted to come today but the Man said no because he really needs some quiet sleep after passing gas all night. Plus, Buddah and I needed a break from being locked up) and I don't mind change if it happens right here, and I don't have to get put through the M-word.

We don't have to get locked up tomorrow, either, but the day after that we do...I'll just sleep through it and then see what else is new. Maybe the cabinets will all be done and the Woman will get that grout she apparently covets. I hope so, because I kind of want to know what the heck that is.

June 26, 2014

Ok...I THINK we're fixed

I'm fairly sure whatever link was causing the popups has been deleted.

But...

I may have unintentionally deleted a couple of blogs that are still perfectly valid. If your blog is not listed, please leave me a comment WITH the URL so I can add it back.

If you weren't in my blog list, please leave your URL so I can add you. Because...FRIENDS. I want to have all my buds listed.

You are my bud, right...?

Are you getting popups here?

I had a comment a few posts ago from someone who was getting a popup when coming to my blog. I was hoping it was just a one time thing because I have never--and will never--have anything set up for popups other than the comment box...but today I got a popup.

I'm combing through the template looking for code that might allow it, but I can't find anything.

If you're getting a popup ad, please let me know, and tell me what browser you're using and at what point it shows up--when the page is done loading, before it's done loading...?

This has never been a blog where there will be ads, and having one I don't want showing up ticks me off. A lot. So if you're getting it, I apologize, and am looking hard for the cause.


EDIT LATER: I've gone through my blogroll and deleted dead blog links and several blogs that had been taken over by commercial interests and a few suspicious ones. I *think* I found the offending link, but I can't be 100% sure...so if you get a popup now, that means I didn't find it and it's back to square one.

Thanks for the help...it was a little sad to see how many blogs are just gone now, and how many have been taken over by spam.

June 24, 2014

Well, hell...

The window was there...


...and then it wasn't.


I liked that window. That window had a ton of sun every day, and there was a thingy to sit on in front of it, right where I could see the window AND the kitchen table where the Peoples' nomming of noms occurred.

I'm pretty sure they're not putting it back.

Today I just hung out in the closet like I usually do, and when the noisy people were gone I got up because that's when the screen door gets opened. But today the screen did not get opened; if fact, the People LEFT US while they went out to get foods for themselves, and we didn't get out until really late. Like 6:30.

Oh, they mumbled something about wet texture on the walls, but so what? It was time to get out! I've been really good about being back there all day because it doesn't really impact me, but since I have been good, I should get released at a reasonable time.

That's only fair.

It's a shame people aren't fair.

June 21, 2014

Shhh...listen to all that quiet...

...as I survey the wreckage of my domain.


Yesterday all the noisy people left early--like 11:30 instead of 5 or 6--because the dood from the city who was supposed to show up and inspect all the stuff they've already called and told them he can't come over and admire their efforts until Monday. They can't do anything else until he looks at it and says "Good job!" or "You suck" or something like that. The People seem to think they'll get a big thumbs up, but they really wished he could have come when he was supposed to because it just means tacking a day onto the end of the whole thing.

But for me, it was aces. In the morning after breakfast I went back to the closet for my first nap of my birthday and didn't even hear it when they showed up. I got up once to go see what was what, looked down the hall and saw the screen door was closed, so I figured what the hell, I might as well go take another nap. Next thing I know the Man is standing there and telling me I have the run of the house.

So I went out to see what they'd done--the window Buddah and I both really, really liked because the sun always put some awesome puddles right there, and we could lay on the thingy I'm laying on in the picture to enjoy it was GONE--and there were some new holes in the walls, but it didn't look like much got done. The People are all impressed because electrical thingies were moved and the water thingy for the refrigerator was moved.

But yeah, nice and quiet for most of the day, even if the house is a total wreck. I spent some time remembering friends who have left around this time of year, especially Skeezix and now Hendrix--and I enjoyed some noms, and had a few really awesome naps.

So it was a good birthday, and now I am 13.

No one will tell me when my Bar Miztvah is going to be, though.

I get one, right? 

June 20, 2014

13


Yep. Today I am 13.

What am I getting?

Locked in the back of the house, that's what I'm getting.

There's supposed to be real live fresh dead steak for dinner after the noisy kitchen people leave, but we'll see. If they leave too late my birthday dinner will have to be delayed a day, but that's all right because tomorrow I don't have to be locked up at all.

June 18, 2014

Hmm...Interesting...


The kitchen is gone. Well, the stuff that was in the kitchen is in the front room, but all the pieces and parts are gone. There was a lot of noise yesterday, and when it stopped the People let us come out from the back of the house, and it was all gone. They're not upset, so I figure this is one of their things, so I explored and then asked for dinner.


Buddah. on the other hand, is not sure it's just one of their things, and he's not very happy. He wants to snoopervise the noise makers, but no one will let him come out from the back of the house to get the job done.


He gets points for wanting to help, I think.

Today is just as noisy as yesterday, but after breakfast I went to sleep in the closet like I usually do so it's not bothering me much. The Woman actually said to me when I came out to ask for treats for us both (me and Buddah, not me and the Woman. I mean, she could have some if she wanted but I don't think she cares for them) that I was being "pretty chill about the whole thing."

Well, yeah...you people do stupid things all the time. I'm used to it.

Besides, I want to see the end result. There's always an end result. Sometimes, it's even worth it...

June 16, 2014

Oh man...Look.


They put everything from the kitchen in the front room. INCLUDING THE REFRIGERATOR. This just does not bode well, no it does not.

June 11, 2014

Do you see this?

Do you?

This is the start of the hallway.

The Man put up a screen door at the start of the hallway.

The last time this happened, we got Buddah.

I don't know what the frak we're getting now, but it apparently involves the door, moving crap out of the kitchen into the front room, and I heard the people talking about setting up another water fountain in the Junk Room.

I have a bad feeling.

A bad, it's gonna be furry feeling.

I better start holding it in, because this all seems like it will be poop-on-a-pillow worthy.

June 10, 2014

Hendrix, my man...

A true Gentleman
and my friend
 

Dood...I am going to miss you so hard.
Say hi to our friends at the Bridge for me, and give them head bumps.

Start looking for all the trouble we can get into
And all the delicious noms we can nom
And the sun puddles we can swim in.
I'll see you on the flipside
...and it will be glorious...

June 06, 2014

OHMYCOD

Doods...what the FRUCTOSE did they do to my beloved Twinkies????


It doesn't look right and it doesn't smell right and I'm not finding out if it tastes right or not, but judging by the look on the Woman's face, this one needs to be labeled DO NOT WANT.

I'm really ticked off, because my mouth was all primed for the wonder of Twinkie, and all it got was disappointment.

June 04, 2014

Ugh

You know what today apparently was?

It was Hug Your Cat Day.

Do you know how much running away I had to do to get away from the Woman's arms extended in a zombie let-me-love-you intent to crush?

A LOT.

I am so glad this day is just about over. I need a nap. And a Twinkie. Hell, if she'd given me a Twinkie, I might have let her hug me.

June 01, 2014

Stinky Badness

Ok, so remember a couple of weekends ago when I sent you guys over to my Mousebreath column to tell me all about the high quality foods you like?

Well, the Woman read all the responses and went shopping both in the store and online and she got several cans of a few different brands for us to try. And for the most part, it's been a rousing success other than we like most of them which makes it harder for her to settle on one or two.

Last night was the first time we were getting a particular brand, and she was all oooh you'll like this because it's a big can and I'm going to let you have more than usual and so happy about it that I thought maybe she should eat it instead. I mean, she was damn near gushing over it, so she must have wanted some, right?

Well, she divided that can up and plopped my plate down in front of me, waiting with all these expectations that I would shove my face into it and scarf it down, but doods, I just couldn't do it.

That was not Stinky Goodness.

That was Stinky Badness.

Well? she asked. Aren't you going to eat it?

I sat down and looked up at her. No.

She turned to Buddah, who sniffed it and then walked to the edge of the counter to issue his opinion. It smells like asterisk.

Guys, she said, that stuff is almost two bucks a can.

I re-stated my negative answer, and Buddah started to cry.

She offered to top it off with a crunchy treat.

No.

I should get fed in a dish like this
With an affected huff of Fine, she picked the plates up and scraped the horrible stuff into the trash, and then opened a can of stuff we've assured her we not only like, but will inhale in hopes that we can get to the other kitty's plate to steal some before he's finished.

I don't know why she was out off by our refusal to eat it. I mean, that helped her narrow the field of choices, right?

In other news, since we started trying other brands, there has been no barfing, and she thinks the litter box hasn't been as foul, either. So far the front runners are Avoderm and Wellness, but we also really like Purina Pro Plan. So we might be getting a mix of the three, as long as neither of us shows an adverse reaction to something.

As long as we don't get another can of last night's horrible offering, I think I'll be happy.

Well, as happy as I can be living here with these people...


May 30, 2014

Hey. I was *GOOD*

Okay, so I've told you about the meal rule here, right? If the people have cooked for themselves and I'm very good and don't beg or jump on the table, I get a tiny taste when they're done.

So this afternoon I smelled cooking things and heard cooking things going on, and even though it seemed awfully early, I figured I better get my asterisk into the kitchen to be sure I got a tiny taste.

So I rolled off of a perfectly comfy bed and stretched--because one should always stretch right after a nap--and made my way to the table, where they were already scarfing down the noms.

I did what a good kitty does. I sat on the floor for a few minutes, and then I jumped onto a chair, but I did not beg and I never even tried to get on the table.

"It's pancakes, Big Guy," the Woman said.

So?

The rule doesn't apply to WHAT they're eating, it applies to how *I* behave.

"You won't like it."

I should at least be offered some, right? And the Man even said to make me my very own tiny pancake, and she said I would like to lick a bunch of butter off of it, but did she actually MAKE that pancake for me?

NO.

The rules are the rules, and they broke the rules. I should punish them by ignoring them the rest of the day, and while the Woman is sleeping tonight I should sit by her head and sing my little heart out.

In fact, I think that's what I'll do.

Meanieheads...

May 25, 2014

Take a tissue first...

A long time ago I told a story about how a dog named Stoner got his people to adopt a puppy they named Tank. Stoner was an awesome dog, and he spent a couple of years teaching Tank the things he would need to know in order to be standup kind of woofy, one he would be proud of and comfortable leaving his people with.

Now, Tank was not the brightest bulb in the pack—a couple of times his Mom Lady said (in a not mean way) that he was dumber than a box of rocks—but he was very sweet and everyone loved him a lot. He was goofy and funny and sweet, and that made up for not being especially bright. So when Stoner left for the Bridge, he was content with the idea that while Tank would never really grasp a lot of the commands he had hoped, he was the dog they needed.

Tank was very happy being the family goofball. He got along with the cats, and when a new kitten came along, one the kids found outside when it was freezing cold, he didn’t even try to eat it. He just lumbered along in life, happy and content, even when his people put him through the M-Word in a major way. He didn’t have to spend days in a car to get where they were going, but he did have to ride in an airplane for a long time, and he had to behave the entire way.

In the new place, things looked different and smelled different, and even the people around them sounded different. He didn’t mind; he had his people and his cats, and a very nice garden to roll around in. He even met the cat from next door, who came into his garden every day to nap in the sun puddles and lap up water from Tank’s bowl.

Tank did not mind sharing his water, but there was something about this kitty that was not like the kitties that lived inside his house. It looked a lot like Weezer, the rescued kitten, but it was scrawny and its fur was not pretty. Its eyes were cloudy, and frequently it walked around with eyes closed, as if seeing where one goes is not very important.

It didn’t take long for the youngest of the people to notice that the neighbor’s kitty came over every day. And it didn’t take long for him to notice that there was no water in any dish in the kitty’s yard, even though the kitty was outside all day long, every day. He didn’t see a food dish, either, so he brought out some cat food, picked the kitty up—decided it was a she—and put her down in front of the dish.

She gobbled it down like she hadn’t eaten in a very long time. Tank stayed right by her while she ate, and waited while the Boy went to get the Very Tall Guy, who then stomped over to the neighbor’s front door to confront him about the lack of care he was giving his cat, but the neighbor didn’t really care. It was just a cat after all, and if it was hungry it could hunt.

But that cat can’t see, the Very Tall Guy argued. She’s blind.

Well, a blind cat isn’t much good. Nature will take care of her.

The Very Tall Guy did not like that, not one bit. So he did something he would advise against in most circumstances, because what he did is not very nice in most circumstances.

He stole the neighbor’s cat.

When he went home, Tank was still in the garden with the kitty, and he scooped her up and took her inside, where the Mom Lady snuggled her and checked her over, and declared this kitty needs to see a stabby guy. Now, Tank was alarmed, because the stabby guy is no fun, and this new one sounded funny and thought the people should let their cats play outside in the garden. But he didn’t argue, because that girl kitty really needed some help.

So he waited patiently by the door while they took her to the stabby guy, and when they came home a lot of her fur had been shaved off, and he could see just how very tiny she really was. The Very Tall Guy let Tank sniff her, but he didn’t put her down right away. He wanted to see how the other cats would react, so the kids rounded them up and brought them to the living room, where they took one look at her…and then sat back to lick themselves.

The Mom Lady told the kids they had to be gentle with her; she had not been getting nearly enough food for a very long time, so she was fragile. She was as blind as the Very Tall Guy thought she might be, and her breathing was loud. She wasn’t sick, she was just very tired, and every breath was hard work. She was also very old; the stabby guy thought she was between 18 and 20 years old.

“She sounds like Darth Vader” the youngest person said, so that’s what her name became.

Vader.

She never wanted to go back out into the garden; she was happy inside, where there was always food and water and someone to pet her. A few months later the people needed to move again, and they were very worried about how she would take to a new place; she got around their house so well they were sure she had spent a lot of time in it before they moved in, and moving meant a strange, totally new house, one she wouldn’t be familiar enough with to get around.

But they moved anyway, because people have to do what people have to do.

Tank remembered the lessons Stoner taught him, and one of those lessons was to always be gentle, and to always try to help. So when they got to the new house, he made it his job to be near Vader and to help her find everything she needed.

When he thought she needed food, he walked with her to the kitchen, letting her lean on his leg as he moved slowly. When she looked for the litter box, he nudged her toward it. When she had a hard time finding her nip toys, he brought them to her.

Tank became her guide dog, and was very protective of her.

Vader’s fur grew back out to a lovely, shiny black. Her breathing became normal. She still could not see but she was so happy and content that she didn’t seem to mind having to change houses. Tank was her dog, and the other cats played with her gently when she wanted but seemed to understand she wanted to be left alone a lot of the time.

“They treat her like a queen,” their Mom Lady told the Woman.

Over the last couple of months, Tank’s people realized he was sticking very, very close to Vader, more than usual. And the other cats groomed her. She still seemed very happy and healthy, but she was very old for a kitty, especially a kitty who had been starved for a long time, and they knew that.

Still, they watched her closely, and at the first sign of trouble they intended to take her to the new stabby person.

Then on Wednesday, as they sat in their living room, reading books and newspapers, with everyone there, Vader came into the room and stood in the middle of the sun puddle that poured in through the window. She sat there with her face turned toward the sun, with her eyes closed, and it was like she was soaking in every little bit of it she could. She was practically smiling, and as the Mom Lady watched, she could see the dust motes floating above Vader’s content face, and thought it was very beautiful.

Tank was nearby, as he always was, and he lay down on the floor, watching her. He whined once, but it was not a sad whine; the Mom Lady said later it sounded more like, “Ok. It’s ok.”

Vader curled up there in the sun puddle and went to sleep, napping in the warmth of the sun, with all her people around her and her dog close by, and she stayed there as her breathing slowed, until it stopped.

When she was gone, on her way to the Bridge to meet Stoner for the first time, Tank got up and licked her head, and then went to the back door to be let out. He needed to be alone, and they let him have his space, because even a dog needs his own way to say goodbye.

“When we bring her ashes home,” their Mom Lady told the Woman, “we’ll let him sniff them. And we bought an urn big enough for him, when the time comes.”

Until that day, which everyone hopes is many years away because Tank is only six years old, Vader will share a special spot on the mantel, right next to Stoner.

And I think Stoner would be very proud of Tank, who might have never understood all the commands that he had been able to, but who was able to figure out what was really important.

And sometimes…well, sometimes getting your people to steal the neighbor’s cat is important.

RIP, Vader. I’m glad you got the happily ever after you deserved, and I’ll see you on the flipside.

May 23, 2014

::sniff::

Guys, this is Sugar and one of her people, Jeanette.


Like the Woman and a bunch of other of our friends, Jeanette has been walking for boobies for a long time.

A year ago in January, Sugar was diagnosed with feline mammary cancer.

Doods.

Breast cancer.

The very thing her person walked against.

Yesterday Sugar lost her fight and made her way to the Bridge. She had a great life and was so well loved, that I'm pretty sure she was okay with it being time to go. After all, what more can a kitty ask for? She had a home any kitty would want, and her people fought hard for her. They loved her as hard as they fought for her.

Sugar leaves a heck of a legacy behind. Her people started an organization in her name, Sugar Rub, to educate pet owners about breast cancer in animals and there is a research group founded in her name at the University of Pennsylvania Veterinary School. The work being done in her name will go on and on, long after you and I are gone, and that makes me happy.

In July, the Woman is walking in the Avon Breast Cancer Walk along with Sugar's mom and a bunch of other ladies. Now, the Woman already has her funds raised for that, but if you're looking for a way to help the boobies AND have a tax deductible donation, please consider donating to one of her team mates.  They each have to raise at least $1800 to walk.

You can also donate to the Sugar Rub! Feline Mammary Cancer Fund.

But mostly, think good thoughts for Sugar's people, because they are 163 kinds of sad right now, missing their furry kid. 

May 19, 2014

Hop on over to Ask Max Monday

http://mousebreath.com/2014/05/ask-max-monday-noms-canned-noms/
Today at Ask Max Monday, I asked a question instead of answering any...it's all about canned cat food, and I want your opinions.

Mainly...I need a change in food, and want to know what you like and why. So pop on over and leave comments there instead of here--if you comment there, you might be helping a lot of kitties with food issues and not just me.

Oh and apparently as much as I would like it, steak every night is not an option. :/

May 14, 2014

That kitty deserves an award

Heck, I would give him an entire box of Twinkies AND a whole bag of real live fresh dead shrimp. If you haven't seen it, watch the video. There's no sound because it's security camera footage, but it's amazing.


I have to admit, I'm not sure I would be as brave as that kitty.I would want to save my people--I've saved them from the burning-up fan and the fireplace thingy that got left on--but I'm not comfortable with the outdoors so I might run and hide.

Buddah just might help the dog.

Okay, probably not, but I'm not sure he would stop to think there was something wrong. He still hasn't figured out it's a bad idea to bite the people with the thumbs that open the cans that contain the gooshy foods he loves so much.

I really don't want to think about what will happen to the dog; it probably won't be a happy ending, so I don't want to ponder it, but I really do want to give that cat major props for having giant, clanking steel gonads, even if he's been nootered.

Doods...let's give him a round of applause.





Farking AMAZING!

May 05, 2014

Seriously, doods

No matter what the People try to say, I was not crying because my fountain was not working. I was informing. No water was being spit forth, so I sat there and told the Man about it. And when he looked, I said "Fix it, please."

Oh yeah, I was freaking polite about it.

But I did not cry.

Swearsies.