February 24, 2010

Want to know how I spent my day? Do you?

I'll tell you.

I spent my day in the freaking closet in the big bedroom, curled up on top of the Man's dirty laundry.

Want to know why I spent my day there? Do you?

I'll tell you.

I spent all day there because THAT DAMNED DOG BUTTERS WAS HERE! He had the entire front half of the house to himself where he ran around making the People think he's just soooo cute, while I had to hide to keep him from eating me. Because he would, you know. He sees me and I'm pretty sure he sees a glorious 16 pound snack.

Which is really something, when you consider he probably only weight 12 pounds or so. Maybe 14. Or 20. But I'm pretty sure he could eat me.

You want to know what's worse? Do you?

I'll tell you.

Next week HE IS GOING TO SPEND THE NIGHT!

I chit you not. The People are going to go strap sticks to their feet and try to not die in the snow, and the Younger Human is going to bring that damned dog Butters here and stay ALL NIGHT LONG.

I am going to have to just live in the closet.

My life is over.

21 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh Max! I do feel so sorry for you! Look around tho, is there anyway you can bribe him to leave you alone? Maybe save up some of that Denny guy's stuff for him? Or maybe you can blackmail him, there must be something in his past you can use. Good luck! paulajeanne and molly

Teddy Westlife said...

I am not sure I like the younger human so much any more. I mean, really.

mister jeter harris, hizself said...

dood,
thingz cood be werse. u cood hav dat stoopid kitten joba pushin u in da corner an yellin at u in dat dumb deep voice.
duhr. i hate dat.
mi brudder whitey sez:
The closet? I love the closet, Max. And while you're in there, leave a little something for your people. I love to pee in the closet when I get a chance.
wow ... werdz uv wizdum frum mi brudder whitey.
impressiv.
yerz--jh

The Creek Cats said...

We don't blame you for taking refuge in the closet!

Anonymous said...

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The Furry Bambinos said...

That totally sucks, Max. What did Buddah do while THAT DAMNED DOG BUTTERS WAS HERE? Gasp, did he get eaten?

Actually, we like closets cause we feel safe in there. But it's different when you are going into a closet to fear for your life.

Padre, Panda Bear, Meerkat, Cookie, and Caramel

Gemini and Ichiro said...

You know if they feed you in there too it can be an okay thing--you know sort of like breakfast in bed. Don't give up Max... at least not yet.

Amy & the house of cats said...

Max, it stinks that the dog is there, but the closet does make a great place to nap at least. And it is only one night at least!

The Whiskeratti said...

Aw Max that is rotten. Woofies!!

Mark's Mews (Marley, Lori, Loki, and Binq) said...

Oh Max! That is awful news. Mebbe ya could whap his nose (wif a couple claws even) and get him ta leave ya alone...

Anonymous said...

Darn Butters, he's getting in the way.

Memories of Eric and Flynn said...

That's defeatist talk Max. You have a week to devise a cunning trap for Butters.

Angel, Kirby and Max said...

Poor Max. Intimidated bu a doggie! Surely you could take him!

Just Ducky said...

I feel for you Max. It's the way I feel about having that little runt here.

Ivan from WMD said...

What is wrong with your people, Max? Don't they know this sort of stuff flies in the face of universal order?

The Island Cats said...

Max, that's just so wrong...you shouldn't hafta stay in the closet...that Butters should stay in there....

Gigi said...

I think this is a time for desperate measures, and by this I mean an alliance with.....Buddah. I mean, he is a pretty hefty guy, much like yourself. He can't be crazy about this intrusion either. Strength in numbers, Max, strength in numbers. You can totally take him.

Shaggy and Scout said...

Yikes!
He's gonna eat all your kibble from the never-ending dispenser and slobber in your water!

Quill and Greyson said...

Damn Butters! I chit you not that Mom laugh really hard, but then she's cruel.

Fat Eric said...

Oh, poor Max! I would just freak out if a d-o-g ever entered my house. Pee in the closet, I say, then they'll be sorry!

PeeJay said...

Max! You silly cat, surely you can cause some mischief that can be blamed on the dog. Then he won't be welcomed back.

Also, I want to visit the planet Anonymous is on.