This is Buddah.

He's, what, six years old? Six and in all those years he has learned nothing from me.

Really.

Like yesterday? Well, the litterbox had not been scooped in a timely enough manner for either of us. Granted, I'm a little particular and would prefer it if the people hired someone to come in and stand there and scoop after both of us every time we use the box, but I'll settle for frequent scooping and
cleaning.

Buddah usually doesn't care. The box can be loaded and he hops right in. But yesterday even he didn't want to get in it, so he pooped on the floor right in front of it.

Now, this I can respect. It's the right thing to do: it sends a message and it means the people have some cleaning to do.

But doods...when you have to poop on the floor the right thing to do is to walk away quietly. Our box is in the laundry room, which is in between the hallway and the rumbly bike room. The people rarely turn the light on when they're passing through the laundry room to get out to the bikes. So if a guy has to resort to pooping on the floor... doods, you stay quiet and hope that a person walks in there and steps on it barefoot. You just do!

But Buddah?

Sheesh.

Last night he pooped on the floor, and what did he do?

He went and told the Woman! I mean, first he was a little confused about what to do. He jumped on the fake fireplace in the room with the dammit machines, and when she walked by he meowed at her really loud, it was almost like a wail; she just thought he wanted crunchy treats and told him no, he'd already had some. But then she headed for the giant litter box room to take care of her own business, and he followed her, practically hollering at her, all listen to me, listen to me!

Well, she got part of the message. She guessed that he wanted the box cleaned. So she asked the Man if he would carry the box outside and dump the whole thing so we could have a 100% clean box.

And that's when they discovered Buddah was trying to tell them he'd pooped on the floor.

No, they didn't get mad or anything. The Man scooped it up and took the box out and dumped it all and then hosed it out. The Woman dried it and refilled it with fresh litter, so Buddah was happy. I was happy to have a clean box, too, but dangit.

Buddah had a prime opportunity to get a person to step onto a nice fresh pile o'poop, and he went and actually told her he'd done it.

I think I need to just give up on him.

He's never going to learn.

Comments (15)

You're prolly right, Max. But he's awfully cute! Six years old? Wow.

You would think he had learned a thing or three from you! Mebbe a well-placed whap will shape him up. Haf a pawsome day. xoxo

Man talk about cats being too polite. That is so wrong. Even I don't announce things like that (but I do howl and then run around like I'm feeling so free and good but I do that every poop in the litter box).

OMC, this is the funniest thing the mom's read all day. We're glad she keeps our boxes pretty darned clean! (So is she. LOL.)

I can't believe your little bro is six, Max. And you know? Some cats are just good boys, like me.

Oh Buddah, you have a lot to learn, buddy! Listen to Max.

Once when I thought my litter box was really nasty, I went over to my human and looked really mad at her, then demanded she follow me. She did, and I showed her the dirty litter box and looked really stern at her again. She got the message, and I did not even have to use the floor!

BTW, Buddah is probably fine and he was probably just complaining, but your humans should keep an eye on him for a few days to make sure he is going to the litter box okay. Occasionally a cat acts weird and vocalizes when they are having litter box issues. Like I said, he is probably fine, but it is always good to be safe!

My brother, Manny, poops on the floor when his belly is sore. He did it the other day and Mom wouldn't clean it up she made Dad do it. She said she was sick of cleaning up after him, she was mad cause our litter box was clean enough. She scoops every morning.

Buddah is a black kitty like me. We are handsome devils. So are you Max!

We think Buddah is a little bit of a suck-up, Max. He's too afraid he'll get in trouble.

I loves me my Buddah but what a sadly wasted opportunity!

I think Buddah's fine...one or the other of us tends to poop outside the box when it gets nasty. We used to have 2 boxes but for some reason now we only have one, and since we're picky...

Poop on da floor...

He does need to learn more from you!

We think Buddah was actually lecturing your People in his own way.

And you guys are two litter boxes short - the recommended number of litter boxes is n + 1, with n being the number of cats in the house. Unless you have a giant litter box pool like Katnip Lounge. ;-)

Purrs,
Padre, Panda Bear, Meerkat, Cookie, Caramel, Sunny, and Sky (and fosters Jett, Panda, Domino, Louisa, Kurt, and Brigitta)

P.S. DON'T ASK how many litter boxes are in our house. A LOT.

Buddah, you are a gentleman!Thank you so much for coming to see me while I was in the hospital. xoxoxox

Time to send him to remedial school.