Okay so my people decided they were gonna start eating better and they wanted to shed some girth because apparently that gets in the way of things they think are fun but I find just plain disgusting and I don't even wanna go there, really. They decided this before the man had that scare thinking his heart was broken, so they've been eating better for like 5 weeks now.

Kitties...this is not a good thing. The food they eat now? It smells good and all but there's so little of it that they refuse to share! It used to be that if I sat there very politely I would get a tiny taste of whatever they had for dinner unless it was going to make flames shoot out my asterisk, but now? Not a chance. They're =this= close to sticking their faces down and licking their plates clean.

Now every week they go see this person Jenny Craig and she sells them the food they're going to eat all week. Kind of like a crack dealer for fat people. I mean really, they could do crack and get the same results and have a lot more fun, I think, but they seem to like this Jenny person.

But Jenny Craig does not give them enough food to share with the kitties. She gives them these tiny, tiny meals and then makes them eat fruits and vegetables, which I cannot stand. This tells me that Jenny Craig is rude and inconsiderate.

This also tells me something very important: Jenny Craig must be pooped upon.

I just don't know how to get the people to bring her here, where this can be accomplished, instead of going there every week.

But clearly, she must be pooped upon.

Comments (23)

Jenny is evil! But she will help your people loose part of themselves.

Death to Jenny Craig. I love the fact that my human doesn't eat any food that she doesn't cook herself right now. No matter how little she wants to eat, there is always some for us! HA!

Clearly, Max, you are right, as always!

Our humans are trying to eat more healthy too, it sucks!

What? This Jenny Cwaig thing is messing up with your peoples! How can your peoples forgets that fwuits and vegetables are evil and we kittehs have a wight to evewy piece of food on their tables? I totawwy agwee. Poop on her.

Boy

You should have your people go here: www.letsdolunch.com

Then you'd probably get some food!

I hope it's working for your people. My Mommeh has been trying to lose the same 10 pounds for over a year!

I don't know about my Mommeh's diet plan: she eats a little all day and exercises, but at night she has wine and cheese and chocolate. I'm not sure what that diet is called...

Max, thanks fur your simpathees on my marble removal yesterday. I feel bedder now that I had sum sleep.

And if peoples are trying not to eet so much why dont they just let us help? And they shood chase fethers to git fit.

Max, if you figure out a way to get that Jenny person over, let us know...we'll come over and poop on her too...she must be stopped...

She's poop-worthy.
Jenny Craig, not your Woman. She's doing a good thing.....
for herself, not that the kitties have a say in it.

absolutely. death to jenny

oh and why would people want to be healthy? that would just give them energy which they would use OUT of the house and not just sitting around moaning and being available as a kitty couch. why would anyone NOT want to be a kitty couch?

That Jenny woman sounds real bad. We would poop on her pillow for you if we didn't live so far away.

Wow, that sounds bad max (get it "Bad Max"? Haha we crack us up).

We are lucky The Big Thing does his weight control with small portions and fresh foods (well good stuff fer him). But still, we get shavings of chicken an ham an stuff before he ruins it in ways he likes.

We hope that Jenny lady don't show up here!!!

I laughed so loud I scared my kitty. Maybe you can get more temptations?

Crack for fat people! I LOVE it. When Tommy read that she announced, Jenny wasn't visiting our house--ever.

I wish you luck with the people who think they know best...

Noir

Mom and Dad went to dinner last night, and they saw a sign that said "Jenny Craig". Oh dear. Is she everywhere? Tell ya what, if we see Jenny Craig, we'll poop on her for you.

Padre, Panda Bear, Meerkat, and Cookie and Caramel (the fosters)

Dang healthy thing....we hope your beans snap out of it soon, Max!

Purrs and hugs,
The Kitty Krew

that' pretty awful, Max. you should poop on her, Dude. there should be enough food for you too.

that' pretty awful, Max. you should poop on her, Dude. there should be enough food for you too.

Well, at least that Jenny creature doesn't sell them food for you and Buddah--you'd both be cat bones by now!

I do not trust this Jenny person.

Huffle Mawson

I love the fact that my human doesn't eat any food that she doesn't cook herself right now.

--
Vince
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