You guys are right; if I keep peeing inappropriately, the People will get all "Oh noes!" on me and drag me off to the stabby place. So I decided this weekend to just use the litter box like I'm supposed to. Instead of worrying them with my bladder, I decided to hide under the bed, which freaked the Woman out even more.

I could hear her walking up and down the hall calling out to me, but I was comfortable, dammit, and when a guy is comfortable he just doesn't jump up when some bimbo otherwise well intentioned female calls out to him. I heard her looking everywhere. She opened closet doors, she looked in the bathtub, and I even heard her open the door that leads into the room where the rumbly bikes sleep. She didn't quite panic because on some level I think she knew there was no way I could have--or would have--gotten out, but it was certainly starting to annoy her.

When you hear a People mutter "Where are you, you little $hit?" that's a sure sign of annoyance, and it's great fun to drive them to that point.

Eventually it occurred to her that she hadn't looked under the bed, but I think that was only because it was the only place she hadn't looked. She asked me if I was feeling all right, and to that I could only respond by turning around and showing her the glory of my former nads.

I think I need something new to pester her with this week. It doesn't have to be overtly creative, because obviously, she's easy to get to.

What to do, what to do...?

Comments (22)

I am glad that you have decided to use the litterbox again. You did a good job of hiding from the Woman. Let's see, what to do next? Maybe you could drag stuff she likes to keep hidden into the middle of the living room floor? Bras are really good for this.

We are glad that you were just hiding for the fun of it and not because you weren't feeling well. Mom keeps a flashlight near the bed just for checking on those of us that hide under there on a consistant basis (Cody and Miss Jade).

Tavi, Cody, Camie, Miss Jade and Gracie

Hmmmm, hiding unner da bed sound like yoo don't like somefin dat's going on. Did dey do somefin else besides mess wif yur baffroom spot? How about da bang bangs from all weekend?

Maybe you've taught the people a lesson enough for now Max.

Huffle Mawson

Hmm.... Max's brain at werk... everyone stand back! This should be good :)

LMAO. Hilarious! Although what the hell is the "stabby place"? Dude, sounds hardcore. You gotta get out of there. It's not way to live your life. To freedom!

Max, I am glad you are using the litter box. However I think the Woman would still be thinking vet because you are acting unusual...

Going outside the litter box twice... hiding under the bed... perhaps a game... this game says "i'm not feeling well. my symptoms are going to the bathroom outside the litter box and hiding under the bed." it merits a trips to the stabby place to make sure your insides are working okay. if it's a game, pick an obvious one, like shredding paper and leaving it on the computer, or turning on the tv without the need of the woman and man.

Max, you are awesome! We love to drive our servants crazy by hiding in strange places and ignoring their calls!

Hiding is always a fun game. Just be careful with it, as others have said, or the Woman may still think something's wrong.

As for pestering them, you could always go with an old stand by of pooping on the pillow, or standing on the keyboard so they can't type. ;)

Purrs and hugs,
The Kitty Krew

Oh Max, my mom is ever so easy to freak out and we really don't have that big of a place to hide! Her voice gets panicy and when eventually I show my face because the woman shakes a bag of treats...then she gets all pissy and acts like it's my fault she got all scared...sheesh!

And that is why you are the master! We can only hope to learn part of your tricks!

Max, we think you gotta come up with a new plan to confuse the Woman cuz what you're doing just might land you at the stabby place anyways...just sayin'....

I agree hiding might also make the Woman freak. I like to look real intently at Mom till she thinks I am looking at a bug on her. Freaks her out~

You could lay on top of her so she can't work at the puter.

hy.. nice to see your cat blog...hehehehe :)

From Marti's cat Pumpkin:

You are so lucky that you have a bed to hide UNDER. My mom has a platform bed, so the only place to hide is in the space between the head of the bed and the wall.

Does the woman have a small bookcase near the bed? This is what I do to annoy Marti. There is a nightstand made up of cubes where she keeps her favorite books. When Marti is trying to stay asleep in the morning, I paw a couple of the books out onto the floor. I've even put some scratches on the dust jacket of a book about flute playing that she SAYS cost her $50.

If you don't have a bookcase in the bedroom, when they are out all day, go to the huge bookcases they have in the den and start pulling books out so that when the woman comes back, she has a big job of putting them back. Doesn't that sound like fun?

If you wondered how I thought this up,let me tell you that I'm 15 years old now and wiser than ever.


P.S. from Pumpkin:

I'm glad Max that you decided to go back to using the litter box.

Miss Pumpkin
15 yrs. old last month

Sometimes Huggy Bear will hide under the bed too, and not even come out for treats, which really freaks Mom out.

My new trick is laying on the mouse, or at least 80 percent of the mouse pad, when Dad is on the computer. This might be a fun annoyance for your Mom.

nice. i love that you are driving them to distraction. it is good you stopped peeing before you had to see the evil VET. i must admit, my mommy would probably make me go to the stabby place if i kept hiding tho.

careful that the next thing you do is more distructive and obvious, like whapping glass off countertops, so you don't have to go. perhaps passing gas in her face overnight and then pretending to be asleep?

I think.. its good for you max...

I love ta play the hidey-sleepey game wif The Big Thing. I have places he STILL hasn't found!