Tagged by Mr. Hendrix for Seven Weird Things About Me!

You realize I can come up with far more than seven, right?

  1. I am an attention whore...but only on my own terms. I will sit and stare at the Woman until she puts down whatever she's doing to make a lap for me, and I will meow at her until her head pops so that she will make a lap for me. But I don't like to sit in anyone else's lap.

  2. I can poop at will, and do so with am amazing capacity anytime I am forced to go to the stabby place. Once, it was so stinky that people in the waiting room were gagging, and the door was closed.

  3. Because of this innate ability, combined with my loving and gentle personality, my stabby place records indicate I must be sedated for future visits, and once when the People took Buddah there in my plastic tomb, the stabby people said "Oh thank God, it's not Max."

  4. I have a beautiful singing voice and enjoy sharing it with my People, especially at 3 a.m., because this is when the quiet of the house lends itself to the charming acoustical nature of my warbling tenor. They throw things at me, but I think this is a lot like when Englebert Humperdink is on stage and women throw panties at him. It just means they love my performance.

  5. I understand the Rules--if the kitty is a good boy when the people are having dinner--he will get a bite if it is something he really, really likes--and I obey them. I don't jump on the table during dinner, even though I am allowed on it when no one is eating. I tap people on the elbow to remind them I am there, but i know better than to get on the table.

  6. Twinkies are the exception. While I still understand the Rules, I cannot follow them if I know there's creamy goodness in someone's hand. If I could, I would snatch it away from whatever person has the Twinkie, I love them that much.

  7. I do not eat bugs. I will rip off their little wings and legs, but the idea of buggy consumption grosses me out. This means that the Woman frequently has to euthanize a bug, and she does not enjoy it, not at all.

I'm pretty sure this has made the rounds already, but if you haven't done it and have seven weird things about yourself, please do it. It's kinda fun! Buddah will do it soon, too, when he stops looking for his lost toys.

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