Posted by Max | Posted on 6/21/2017 08:19:00 PM

So. Yesterday was my sweet 16th. I have lived longer than any other cat that the Woman has lived with. She's kinda surprised, given my weight, but she's not going to examine it too much, because...well, why rock the boat?

I was all excited when I got up, because THIS WAS THE DAY! I was going to go to the DMV and get my license. But then the Woman was all, "Sorry, dood, I have to go get my boobies squished," which was fine, because BOOBIES, but when she came back she dosed me with some hard reality.

She sat in her chair and said, "This is where the driver sits. And this--" she pointed at her foot "--is where the accelerator is. Can you sit here and get your foot down that far? Because you have to in order to make the car go."

Well. Damn.

It wasn't even noon and my dreams were shattered.

Still, there was STEAK, which made up for it, and PRESENTS, which were sent by awesome people. Auntie Michelle sent me some crunchy treats, which I didn't get a picture of because I made the Woman open them as soon as I saw them, and they are really good.

But the Woman took pictures when I opened the other present. This one from the Food Lady, my spiffy editor at Mousebreath.


Smells good.

Open it for me. I don't have thumbs.

Holy crap, doods! LOOK AT ALL OF THIS STUFF!!! There's nip and super nip and nip toys and tiny treats to make my breath fresh and a feathery thing that Buddah reallllly wants to get his paws on.

I decided to guard the feathery thing for a while. And get my spit on it. Just to ruin his fun.

Even if I did wind up sharing with Buddah...
 Tonight, there was bacon, so it was like my birthday kept right on going. And there's still more steak! The only disappointment was not getting my driver's license, but I suppose that's all right since I really hate going outside.

Comments (18)

You deserve it all, dood. We love you.
V & the boys


I am furry glad that yoo had a great Birfday even though yoo cannot drive. An' yoo got a can of hooligans! Lucky!!!


Happy birthday (one day late), Max! You got some awesome birthday perks... and trust me, you don't want to drive anyway. Driving makes my human spew HBO words sometimes, so it can't be all that.

Happy birthday! Those presents, bacon, and steak seem better dan a license anyways.

Happy Birthday Max.
Don't drive. Let the Woman drive you! Max, be driven!

we hear cars are overrated. we were kind of glad to see toys in that can since it seemed kind of small to fit both Reno and Homer MOL

Love you Max! Looks like it was a mighty fine day!
Scout and Lynne

HAPPY SWEET 16 BIRTHDAY! Max you are totally the greatest and the best!

Well, that was a super gift to make up for those harsh realities..

Although people without legs drive..

Happy birthday, Max! 16 sure is sweet!

BTW, what the Woman failed to tell you is operating the pedals is what Buddah is for! You do the driving. Our old bros William and Russell worked that all out eons ago.

Happy Birthday, Max! You apparently are NOT slowing down a bit!

PS, Max you could always drive if you get signed up with Uber! They have cars that drive themselves! Who needs the pedals!

Sorry you had to share.....!

Happy 16th birthday, Max!

Happy Birthday...belatedly...Max! That is a cool gift from The Food Lady.

Happy 16th birthday!

Happy belated 16th Max! Glad you got good foods and toys! You deserve it. You are special! Well, OK, all of us kitties are special, but somehow, you are specialmer... 16, wow.

Sorry you can't get to drive. So now she has to drive you around. Wonderful that you got all those treats and other good stuff.