All right, so early this morning I was being nice and quiet, curled up by the Woman's head because it was not quite food o'clock, and besides, the Man went to pass gas last night which meant he was going to be the one to open cans for us this morning. Buddah was asleep on the tower in the corner, his feet sticking straight up like a corpse, with his tail hanging over the side.
We we all nice and relaxed, sleepy-warm and happy.
Then out of nowhere, the Woman snorted so loud and so hard that Buddah jumped, I jumped, and she grabbed her own face and said several things off the Bad Word List.
But guys...I'm not really sure she even woke up. Her eyes stayed closed even while the heels of her hands were pressed hard onto her cheeks, and after a minute she sighed and her hands went back down, and she was definitely asleep.
I checked to make sure I hadn't peed--I couldn't care less if I whizzed by her head, I just didn't want any on my furs--and then jumped down, lest she go off like a shotgun again.
I didn't even see Buddah jet out of the room, but he must have because he was in the front room when I got out there and I had no explanation for him about what had just happened other than maybe she had tried to eat her own head from the inside out and the release of all that hot hair that swirls around inside her skull created a vacuum.
Tonight, I'm sleeping in the other room.
We we all nice and relaxed, sleepy-warm and happy.
Then out of nowhere, the Woman snorted so loud and so hard that Buddah jumped, I jumped, and she grabbed her own face and said several things off the Bad Word List.
But guys...I'm not really sure she even woke up. Her eyes stayed closed even while the heels of her hands were pressed hard onto her cheeks, and after a minute she sighed and her hands went back down, and she was definitely asleep.
I checked to make sure I hadn't peed--I couldn't care less if I whizzed by her head, I just didn't want any on my furs--and then jumped down, lest she go off like a shotgun again.
I didn't even see Buddah jet out of the room, but he must have because he was in the front room when I got out there and I had no explanation for him about what had just happened other than maybe she had tried to eat her own head from the inside out and the release of all that hot hair that swirls around inside her skull created a vacuum.
Tonight, I'm sleeping in the other room.
15 comments:
I like your explanation, Max. You have such a unique view of things
The snore snort affects many.
~Vicat
Honestly, things have gotten hopelessly out of control if we can't even trust the Humans to shut up when they're asleep.
Man, imagine that...
Whoa, Max! Maybe your human was temporarily possessed!
Oh, Max. Be glad it doesn't happen efurrynight, like at our house. Our mommer has threatened our daddy wif a pillow ofur the face more times than I can count!!! She sez she can levitate like a lama when he snorks! --Edmund
not peeing is a good thing. I don't blame you for finding some place else to sleep
Mum snorts sometimes, but usually we sleep in the other room to begin with.
We hate to even mention what all our humans do in their sleep. MOL!
You mightn't have peed yourself Max, but I think my mum almost did, she was laughing so much.
My dad snorts like that sometimes and wakes himself up and mum gives him the elbow in the ribs.
Oh Max, you make my day with your snarkalicious kittytude. Sorry about the snort, but it sure made for an awesome post.
These beans sure make some funny noises sometimes. Betcha the woman was glad you didn`t pee yourself too!
Sasha, Sami, & Saku
You shoulda peed on the woman considering how she disrupted both you and Buddah.
Max, I had to rush in the bathroom because the explanation of what the Woman was doing AND the image of Buddah sleeping with his feet in the air was so funny. So consider yourself a comedy writer, a potentially laundry problem thing of scaredness because an almost laundry problem of funny.
The Woman sounds dangerous while asleep. Well, OK, TBT does stuff too. Sometimes he suddenly kicks a leg straight out while asleep. Naturally, we dont sleep at that spot...
Post a Comment