I have carefully cultivated a night time routine that suits me quite well. After my 10 p.m. snack I stretch out on the big comfy bed until around 11:30, when the Woman comes into the room and sits in bed to read before shutting things down for the night. When she comes in, I yawn, glare at her, and then jump down, making sure she understands that I am not happy; I was comfortable and don't want to share the bed.
After I get some dry noms, I take a nap in her chair in the living room, waiting until 4:30 in the morning, when I jump up onto the bed right by her head, and meow softly. She wakes up just enough to give me head skritches, and then I plop down and let her sleep until it's time for breakfast. She gets up, feeds us, stumbles back to bed, and I go plop down by her head again. When it's time for her to get up for real, I meow her away, get head skritches, lead her to the giant litterbox room, I make sure she does everything in the right order and that she doesn't forget her drugs, then I lead her into the kitchen so she gets a fizzy drink.
After all that, I'm tired, so I get some dry noms and go back to the big bed to sleep for a few hours.
This routine has been really nice for a long time.
The problem? She noticed it. She told the Man how I've been getting head skritches at 4:30 but I'm not keeping her awake, and that she likes that so much more than the concertos I was holding in the hallway.
Well.
Now I have to change the routine. It's bad enough she noticed it. She LIKES it. Clearly, I have to resume singing instead of getting head skritches. I won't enjoy it as much, but a guy has to do what a guy has to do.
I can't go around being predictable.
I hope she enjoys the music I've selected for tonight. I call it "Cat Tail Under Giant Foot."
It's a real screamer.
After I get some dry noms, I take a nap in her chair in the living room, waiting until 4:30 in the morning, when I jump up onto the bed right by her head, and meow softly. She wakes up just enough to give me head skritches, and then I plop down and let her sleep until it's time for breakfast. She gets up, feeds us, stumbles back to bed, and I go plop down by her head again. When it's time for her to get up for real, I meow her away, get head skritches, lead her to the giant litterbox room, I make sure she does everything in the right order and that she doesn't forget her drugs, then I lead her into the kitchen so she gets a fizzy drink.
After all that, I'm tired, so I get some dry noms and go back to the big bed to sleep for a few hours.
This routine has been really nice for a long time.
The problem? She noticed it. She told the Man how I've been getting head skritches at 4:30 but I'm not keeping her awake, and that she likes that so much more than the concertos I was holding in the hallway.
Well.
Now I have to change the routine. It's bad enough she noticed it. She LIKES it. Clearly, I have to resume singing instead of getting head skritches. I won't enjoy it as much, but a guy has to do what a guy has to do.
I can't go around being predictable.
I hope she enjoys the music I've selected for tonight. I call it "Cat Tail Under Giant Foot."
It's a real screamer.
13 comments:
Max, you could alternate between the two, but do not set a pattern. Sing for three nights and get scritches for one, sing for one, scrithchs for two. You know, keep her guessing!
You have to keep the humans guessing all the time.
you could add to your activiyies, Maybe a paw in her open mouth. Maybe a few wacks with your tail as you sit on her head, We have found these to be entertainig at 4AM.
Max, we have our routine here and sadly, it suits my human quite well. We are slackers.
Any chance you and Buddah could work out a team activity for extra variety. The House Ninja and his Minion alternate between playing pinball with their skulls on the legs under the bed and adding a loop of up and over the sleeping bodies during the 3am game of Ass On Fire.
Since the woman likes what you've been doing don't change it. Why not add a list of demands to those skritchs after all, if she noticed and likes the way you've been doing things she'll be much more agreeable. Like she might even start wearing pants sometimes. Or something. Or even long shorts made from different material seeing as where you live has been so warm lately.
mes would do scritches at 4:30 and then gets the human up at least a hour early for a couple of days...
Kisses
Nellie
We need to change up the routine around here too, Max. We should never let the humans get complacent.
MOL, sounds like a pawsome song!
Ya DONT like sharin the bed? That's nearly our favrit part of the day. Er, night.
We share at moms naptime but nighttime with the man added in is just not where we want to be.
MOL! Gotta keep the beans guessing. We bets she'll enjoy your song...but she wonts say so.
Sasha, Sami, & Saku
Well, I think you're on the right track, as soon as she thinks she's on to you, you change the routine. That's exactly how it goes. We used to have an aquarium I liked to attack around 5-6 am. That woke up my staff pretty fast. But now the fishies are gone, so I have had to think of other means. We're lucky we are cats, we have no limits for our imagination. Keep up the good work!
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