Buddah and I were having a private conversation when the Woman stomped out of the bedroom and grumbled, "It's five in the freaking morning!" to which I replied, "So?"

She was not amused.

People, it's not our fault if you can't sleep through some gentle meowing. We were being quiet; I was not singing or howling, I was just talking to the little monster. I thought you wanted me to be nice to him.

It's also not our fault if you were awake until after four in the freaking morning. You're the one who just had to finish reading that book. If you'd gone to sleep at a normal time, chances are you would have been so deep asleep you would have slept right on through our plotting polite conversing.

Oh, and clean out the fire thingy. I want you to be able to turn it on already!

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