I have a really good way of waking the Woman up every morning now. She doesn't like it, but it works.

I poke her in the eye.

Not hard (and I don't have claws)... I just take my fuzzy little paw and poke her kinda soft, but she wakes up pretty freaking quick. She says all kinds of bad words and makes me get off the bed, but I get right back up and tell her over and over that we're starving and she needs to get up RIGHT NOW.

I may have worked a little too hard...this morning she had the dreaded Squirt Bottle beside her. I poked and she reached over, got the bottle, and doused me.

After geting off the bed I thought, "that's not fair!" so I jumped back up, and she squirted me.

I got back up and meowed over and over and over, and she squirted me.

So I jumped up, ran across her head, down to the floor, and she couldn't squirt me.

Then I stood by the door and meowed, and she squirted me.

But, ha! I am not stupid. I stood just outside the door, where the squirt could not reach, and meowed and meowed and meowed.

Okay, so she didn't get up, but the Man did.

I got my Stinky Goodness, and that's what matters.

Tonight while they sleep, the squirt bottle must die.

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