SHE CHEATED ON ME!

For reals.

The Woman was gone for like, forever, or maybe for like 3 nights, and I thought she was out doing walking things , but no. You know what she was doing?

She was spending time with That Damned Dog Butters and his new sister, Lady. And not just "time." She was there all day and all night THREE TIMES IN A ROW. All her clothes were covered with dog hair when she got back. I could smell where they licked her. The worst part?

SHE LIKED THEM.

And then things got all worse when the Man left the house Monday and was gone for a few hours and came back smelling like them. Because of THIS:

I am so unhappy right now.

I may have to ignore them both.

For, like, WEEKS.

Except around breakfast, lunch, and dinner time, because I am practical, even when I'm annoyed.